Love And Marriage

Many a times wedding becomes a routine turning point in life. An inevitable social ritual to see two people commit to each other and there by create an illusion of togetherness both to themselves and people around. A well thought of element in the stream of life that makes everyone feel safe with respect to their moral, social and religious beliefs.

The anticipated emotional priorities and faith in calculated future looks very nice, reasonable and justified to those who think outwards and look not deeper in their souls. Love is something that is not precipitated by some kind of created environment.

It is incomprehensible for me to see why love should culminate in to marriage. It just happens. By force, by reason or by need. A subtle feeling of domination creeps in so invisibly that we start feeling the necessity to preserve our feeling of superiority. Or on the submissive or skeptic side we start feeling the same in a reverse fashion. The answer then becomes wedding.

I started wondering if the value of love is realized only when we lose it. But even that kind of loss now days are offered with alternatives by means of positive thinking ideas. Surely one has the liberty to take control of their life. And he or she must look elsewhere when one side is closed. But why it becomes an impossible situation when ego taints one’s ability to separate what is absolute and what’s relative???

I feel love is absolute and everything else is relative.

Mona told me that confessing love takes three seconds, explaining love takes three hours and proving love takes life time. It’s the most complex thought put in simple words. Perhaps we need an anchor to this most dynamic aspect of love… by means of marriage.

When in marriage, it’s a peripheral need to look happy to everyone around. It is to be proven with biological consequences like children to authenticate physical intimacy that’s stamped with love’s approval. It is necessary to look towards new found tentacles of this act and try concentrating on social responsibilities like raising children and educating them and amassing properties and becoming famous.

But on a quite night when nothing else than the noise of an occasional cricket chirping, star light percolating through lace curtains and winds swept in lazy haste… I would love to be snuggled in the warmth of the girl to whom I lost my heart. I prefer not to think if anyone else including God acknowledges our relation. I wish to let lose in my own Eden where I shall be Adam and she… Eve.

But then again reality slithers like a snake and offers one of us the enticement that pollutes love. And the others follow suit only because they have faith in the other. Then everything gets destroyed. Whatever is buried under the mound of love and tolerance shall develop fissures and displeasure and mistrust starts leaking. The widely practiced and most detrimental routine is to bring in third person in to the binding force of true love and making it porous. I have no disrespect for well-wishers and elders. But a disagreement in a relation needs to be tackled by only those who are in love.

It is but natural for anyone to be on guard as love has an intrinsic element called freedom inbuilt within it. Freedom is breath of life. Freedom gives one wings to fly away and offers strongest foundation if one wish to settle. Freedom is not taught or guided by anyone. Freedom is the clay that could be molded in any fashion and crumbled and remolded later if will demand it. Freedom even makes one hate love and be aloof.

The same freedom is structured within a wedding to definite limits. In love freedom hath no shackles or bounds. Now the conflict I see is if love is captivated by wedding how does that effects freedom???

When know not what to do one simply subscribes to the theory of let go and lets cross the bridge when it comes before us. And they lose track of nourishing love somewhere in between. This either makes love go arid in disinterest and apathy or makes love rotten in disgust and hatred.

I implore people to identify love as something that is as essential as their own existence. As pious as the almighty they worship. Let it be bound by wedding only for external reasons like society, morals, law and religion. Please forget that you were married… the moment you got married. Please treat your loved one as someone who has wings to fly freely. But captivate her in your love that she feels not the need to fly away. Do not just nourish your love… be watchful if your nourishment is making her feel sick.

And… I envy those who relish true love… not knowing that they are relishing it…