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Wednesday, January 16, 2008

An Indian Bride…




Marriage is a memorable event in a girl’s life. I have my own reservations to apply this thought in a man’s life. As most of them consciously or subconsciously feel that marriage is a perk they earn after fulfilling their achievements and identities. They are too engrossed in making money and developing careers, and marriage naturally comes their way either by their own efforts or lack of it there of. (I mean the efforts of elders at home would compensate for the lack of efforts on a man’s part).

My observation since my childhood indicated that no girl would ever admit to get married so blatantly when confronted with the question. Deep within the core of their hearts they always dream of a beautiful future shared with a companion and blissful consequences like social security, children and contentment.

I hail from a small place from down south (India). I used to sneak in to women’s arena when I was a kid. They are tolerant wards little imps who run amok and looked so gorgeously beautiful in their silk saris and jewelry. The other side of the male bastion used to radiate a different aura. They were more concentrated on sharing the glowing pride of groom who used to look so majestic and with not an iota of embarrassment.

Bride… on the other hand always suffered mixed emotions. Deep within her own private confusion she used get invaded from multiple quarters of kith and kin around. It’s just a matter of perception and proportion to see her eyes exhibit all emotions contradicting each other. Fear of unknown, anguish of expulsion, joy of reaching a new page of life and eventual disorientation to experience all these things at same moment.

I am not sure if girls of this age would experience the same in the magnitude what girls about ten years ago experienced. The rule applies same to every generation with a precedent generation. I wonder if all of them are trying to make the bride move away from a fear that’s germinating within her heart. Married woman try look brighter and mischievously tease the bride to break her lethargy.

I saw an advertisement on TV about some diamond jewelry where the bride looks deep and intense in the eyes of groom and says… “You may now kiss the bride”. I beg your pardon but somehow I felt uncomfortable about this streak of western intent. Or rather I dare say even in western culture the groom would be prompted by the priest to kiss the bride.

From the day beginning starting decorating the bride to the point of reaching the wedding arena every step she takes towards the culmination of her future is measured with fear in her eyes. Its so ironic that the girls who are loved so much within the family are suddenly given enlightenment about leaving them and go away with someone unknown or vaguely known.

The other heart wrenching side of her torture is seeing her parents… especially her father cries. It’s something I always consciously avoid. Some times I feel if it is worthy to hurt a girl so much in the name of marriage to wrench away from her father.

Majority of our society is still conservative in thought even it is getting layered with expressions of freedom. I am trying to point my concerns towards the pure and unblemished emotions that go within the heart of a girl.

Their ability to absorb pain and pleasure is quintessential. Their resilience is commendable. Their magnanimity in trying to keep everyone happy is adorable.

My beloved friends from other countries… You must come and witness the above in areas that are not too westernized in my beloved country. You will cherish… for a moment… may be… the power of being so tender and submissive

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